


Panic

by spnfamily_alwayskeepfighting



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Panic Attacks, Reader-Insert, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-07
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2020-01-06 08:56:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18385160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spnfamily_alwayskeepfighting/pseuds/spnfamily_alwayskeepfighting
Summary: Y/N has a panic attack while she's around Diego and he comforts her afterward.





	Panic

You stood before the metal gate in front of The Umbrella Academy. You gripped onto the bars, your knuckles turning white. You were hesitant to walk into the Academy, unsure if Diego would want to see you. You’d never met his siblings, and he never seemed interested in you meeting them.

Yet here you stood, in front of his childhood home, hoping he’d want to see you instead of just brushing you off in front of his siblings as if you two weren’t in a relationship.

You hadn’t wanted to come but the longer you sat alone in your apartment the more your depression began to drown you, suffocating you alive while everyone else breathed freely. Not to mention the panic attacks that kept springing up out of nowhere. 

Taking a deep breath, you slowly pushed open the gate, the squeaking metal made you cringe. Now everyone on earth knew you’d come to visit the Hargreeves. 

You approached the door and knocked lightly. Once. Twice. Three times. What felt like hours was only a few moments before a young woman with a bright smile opened the door.

“Hello, may I help you?” She asked kindly. Definitely unlike how Diego said all of his siblings are.

“Um… hi, I’m looking for Diego… I’m his girlfriend…”

Her smile widened. “Please, come in. I’ll take you to him. My name is Grace.” 

Grace. That wasn’t the name of one of his siblings. 

You followed her through the mansion, glancing at all the animal heads on the walls, and was that a… monkey with glasses standing in the foyer? You should your head, clearly imagining this. 

Grace lead you through the rooms until you arrived in a kitchen. Diego and five others sat around a table arguing—about what, you weren’t sure. They all stopped when they spotted Grace. 

“Diego, dear, you have a guest,” Grace said sweetly. 

Diego’s eyes drifted to you. 

“Aw, Diego has a girlfriend!” One of his brothers said.

“Shut up, Klaus,” Diego said aggressively before standing up, walking over to you.

Klaus. You’d heard Diego mention him before, the brother who was always in and out of rehab. The one Diego secretly liked best though he wouldn’t tell anyone. The one who when Diego heard about someone ODing on his scanner he rushed to make sure his brother was okay.

“What are you doing here?” He murmured in your ear.

“I…” you whispered but you were unable to finish your sentence. You heard a loud ringing in your ears.

_ Fuck, not again. _

You pulled away from Diego and ran from the room. Faintly hearing someone say, “What was that all about?” 

“Diego, what did you do to her?” Another voice said. 

“Nothing. Just stay out of it, Allison.” 

You had to get away. Had to hide. He couldn’t see you have a panic attack. You could already hear and feel your heartbeat throughout your entire body. 

You darted into a random room and slammed the door shut behind you. Picking a corner at random, you sat there, trying so damn hard to center yourself, just hoping the panic attack would end.

It didn’t. 

_ You’re fine, Y/N. Pull yourself together. _

You heard footsteps walking out in the hall. It made you flinch. You curled into yourself, attempting to block out all light and sounds.

_ A-am I breathing? _

You sucked in a breath, feeling the air enter your lungs, but it doesn’t seem to fill them. You held it in for a few moments before releasing. You go through the motions, your body making the movements, but it’s as if your brain doesn’t register the oxygen in your lungs. 

Tears welled in your eyes and you began to hyperventilate at the feeling of being unable to breathe. A raw terror flooded your body and the voices in your head screamed at you to stop. Saying that there’s nothing wrong. 

“Y/N?” You faintly heard Diego’s voice from the other side of the door. 

_ Stop it. Stop sobbing like a child. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you! _

You tried pushing yourself farther into the dark corner behind the furniture.

“H-hey. What’s wr-wrong?” You felt him place a gentle hand on your back, rubbing in slow circles. He sat closer than you expected. “It’s gonna be o-okay. It’s gonna be okay, Y/N/N.” He spoke gently in an attempt to calm you down and help you through your attack.

You shuddered, gasping for air. Everything around you seemed to disappear for a moment as you get lost in the aftermath of your panic attack.    


You slowly lifted your head, finally acknowledging Diego. He looked at you with broken, hurt eyes.

“Y/N, do you need anything, sweetie?”

Both you and Diego shifted your gaze to the door where you found Grace.

“Mom-”

“It’s okay, Diego. Let me.” 

He nodded and Grace turned her attention back to you.

“Ice water,” you said in a raspy voice. “The colder the better… please, and anything sweet.”

She left the room, closing the door behind her. You yelped, the sudden noise also making you jump. 

Diego stared at you, a concerned expression on his face. “Are you o-okay?” he asked gently, placing a tender hand under your chin, beckoning you to look at him. 

A hollow numbness filled you. Your teeth and body buzzed as the adrenaline finally left your system. 

“I think so. I’m sorry you had to witness that…” your cheeks flushed in embarrassment. 

“What happened?” He questioned, getting up to open the door. How he knew Grace was coming, you didn’t know, but you were grateful when he handed you the glass of ice water and plate of chocolate chip cookies. 

You gulped down the ice water, the cold chilling your body, and take a cookie off the platter. “Nothing happened,” you stared down at the cookie to avoid his gaze. Breaking off small bits at a time to eat it. “I was mostly fine one second and the next I get this ringing in my ears signaling my panic attack. I ran off because I didn’t want you to see me while it happened. It’s never pretty.”

He nodded in understanding. “Come on, let’s continue this conversation in my room before I have to explain even more to my siblings than what I already do.” 

He offered you a hand and you take it. He guided you out of the room and through the house. Passing his siblings along the way. He walked by them quickly, dragging you along, trying to avoid speaking to them.

When the two of you entered his room, he pulled you onto the bed. You sat there while he laid back and pulled out a knife, flipping it around in his hand. “Why’d you come here?” He said bluntly, catching you off guard. You knew he wasn’t being rude though, he just simply wanted an answer that you had yet to give.

“I should have called, I know but-”

“It’s fine, baby, just tell me why you came. It was unexpected.”

“I… “ you hesitated, “I didn’t want to be alone any longer. The weight of my depression has been eating me alive. Not to mention every small noise I hear has been making me jumpy as hell from all the panic attacks I’ve been having recently.”

Diego grabbed your arm gently and he pulled you to lay down beside him. You rested your head on his shoulder as he wrapped an arm around you. “Well, you’re not alone now,” he murmured. “Do you wanna talk about what’s been going on?”

You sighed in contentment as he combed his fingers through your hair. “Nothing, at least that I know of. I start the day perfectly fine, happy even, but by the end of the day, I just feel empty. I just long for you to be with me so I’m not alone, but then I decide not to call you because I don’t want to bother you with my problems. Today I came by because… because I couldn’t take being alone anymore. I just needed a hug.”

He pressed a kiss to the top of your head. “I love you, and if you need me, you call me. I’ll be here for you. You won’t bother me with your problems, I promise.”

“Thank you,” you mumbled. Your eyes grew heavy the longer he held you and you drifted off into a peaceful sleep.


End file.
